Tag Archive • wedding

THE LAYERS OF MANAGING YOUR WEDDING

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A WEDDING CAKE MODEL BREAK DOWN TO CONQUER YOUR WEDDING

There are many different factors to consider and decisions to make when planning a wedding.  It can be time consuming, even slightly intimidating.  The key thing that I have learned is to break things down into tangible parts.  There are also many people and relationships who can impact the planning process.  In order to imagine how to prioritize and keep yourself focused, I will use the analogy of a lovely, three-tiered wedding cake.  Each layer has its role to keep the cake together and to make your visualization come to life.

 

TIER ONE—SECOND JOB MENTALITY

I may be one of those rare breeds who turn wedding planning into a fun past time, or procrastination hobby.  But, my strategy to fit in small pieces of wedding planning on a daily basis has completely paid off.  Even if it is just an email or a new board on Pinterest, in the first four months of being engaged, I contributed something every day.  Public transit is a great place to get a couple of emails out on your commute to work; so is taking an extra ten minutes in the morning.

Starting with the base of the cake, this needs to be the sturdiest part.  To solidly begin your planning process, be sure to prioritize the pieces that are most important to you and your partner and start to work on those first.  If there are specific vendors whose work you love and want to be a part of your wedding, chances are, they are popular with other brides too.  So make sure to contact them well in advance.

It is imperative to have a specific notebook, file folder, or Word doc dedicated to wedding planning.  Or, if you are like me, have all three 😊.  Keeping all-things-wedding in an organized system will save you time as you plan and will make follow up a lot easier.  I carry a wedding notebook with me so that I can jot down any new ideas, inspirations or TO DOs wherever I am.  If you are more technology based, having a file on your phone works too.  You can find a helpful wedding guideline here.

Finally, as in your work place, people expect to be treated with respect and to get responses in a reasonable time.  This means that you should always reply to vendors, even if you have chosen someone else.  It also means that you should do your research.  Approach vendors having an idea of who they are and what they do, instead of blanketly asking every photographer in Vancouver to shoot your wedding.  Just as you want to feel special on your wedding day, vendors feel special when people show genuine interest in what they do.

TIER TWO—WHO’S YOUR FAMILY

Most of us will field opinions and ‘helpful advice’ from various family members throughout the wedding planning process.  This can often squish you in the middle between two layers: what you and you’re your partner want and what family members ‘would do if it was their wedding’.  At risk of sounding cliché, remember that this is YOUR wedding and at the end of the day, it only matters what you and your partner want.  It is certainly hard to ignore the advice and opinions of family, especially if you have a close relationship with them.  They love and support you and of course want to help in any way they can.  Sometimes, however, family may not realize the position that giving their opinion can put you in.  In my experience, it is important to listen to what your family has to say, and if it can be incorporated into your plans, then great.  If not, do not carry the guilt of having made a decision that best suits you and your partner.

This applies to choosing your wedding date, your bridal party, your venue, ceremony details and various vendors.  These are all very personal decisions and as long as you can come back to a place where you do what is best for you and your partner- while still respecting your loved ones- you are doing just fine.

TIER THREE—RELY ON YOUR PARTNER

Why would you have chosen your partner if you cannot lean on them and depend on them to help make decisions?  This is why you should involve your partner in the wedding planning process and ask for their opinion on things that you are unsure of.  It is their day too and your wedding should be a representation of the two of you.

I am lucky to have a partner who listens and supports me, even though my idea of personalized embroidered linen napkins was turned down…. On matters of the family, décor, etiquette or ‘which shade of blue’ we should choose, he is there to support me and give his thoughts.

Keeping the conversation open throughout the process will reduce stress and allow you and your partner to create a one of a kind wedding suited for the two of you.  Let this piece be a focal point like the finished product of the top of the cake.

 

GARNISH- BECAUSE A LOVELY CAKE DESERVES A LOVELY GARNISH

-Allow yourself time away from wedding planning when the big deadlines have passed (vendors selected, deposits paid).  Take a weekend off, go away for the weekend, get outside!

-Get the little things done ahead of time!  If something can be accomplished three months prior to your wedding date and doesn’t take up a lot of space or energy- GET IT DONE NOW.  There is no sense in adding extra things on to your plate right before your wedding.

-Remember why you are planning a wedding in the first place.  You would not have to think about all these decisions and dream up all of your amazing ideas if it wasn’t for the fact that you found your partner and you both have chosen to spend your lives together.  So, the next time you wonder why you are taking on a ‘second job’ or deciding between chocolate or vanilla (vanilla  😉), enjoy this fun phase that leads you down the aisle to an amazing life together.

 

Take care and Happy Planning!

Allie

Founder, Alex & Lily Home

MY REGISTRY TOP 5

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ALEX & LILY’S TOP FIVE MUST HAVES FOR YOUR WEDDING REGISTRY

I have written before about the value of registering for your wedding (see Why is a registry important).  So, as I have progressed along with my own wedding plans, I got to experience for myself the joy of registering.  As a shopper, planner, designer and wedding enthusiast, I was so very excited for this stage and I would like to share with you my top five items to register for, that everyone should have on their list.

 

Firstly, everyone has different needs.  The main factor that should guide your registry is your lifestyle.  Do you love to cook?  Are you a wine connoisseur?  Do you love to eat out?  All of these factors play into the types of things you should be registering for.  If you hate to cook and love home décor, don’t stock your registry with solely kitchen items and zero accent pillows.  For me, I love to cook and entertain and want to be prepared to host all sorts of gatherings.  Seeing that I have already built up a fair amount of entertaining pieces- the focus for my registry was geared towards larger, more formal gatherings.

 

If the entertaining items I owned were old and needed replacing, then a wedding registry would be a good time to upgrade.  There wouldn’t be much point to having more than two sets of perfectly functional cheese knives though, for example.  Of course, the wedding registry is meant to start the newlyweds off on the right foot, but keep in mind that you should only register for items you need or will use in the future.

 

So, if you are going to register for your wedding (which I recommend you do), here are my top five items that should be on your list:

#1- Staub or Le Creuset

If you are to have only one kind of cookware in your kitchen- these French inspired pieces should be it.  Not only do both of these brands carry an array of colours to suit your home and your taste- these cast iron stove to oven to tabletop pieces are an effective way to cook a meal and leaves you with much less dishes to clean!  My personal favourite is the Basil coloured Staub cocotte.

#2- Wine glasses

A part of entertaining, wine glasses are an essential thing to have many of.  Chose a brand you like and can get more of (for breakage in the future).  You can either choose to register for a whole line of glassware for each varietal, or simply choose one size in the middle that works nicely across the board.  I love the Riedel Boudreaux glass that works with all varietals.

#3- Towels

Matching, cozy towels are a great way to unify your bathroom.  Towels should be replaced every 5 to ten years or so anyways, so why not get a new set (or two) to fill your newlywed home?!  They say that the rule for towels is as follows: one on the rack, one in the laundry and one on the shelf.  My favourite amazingly cozy towels are from Pottery Barn.  Classic white will last you a lifetime but you can also choose a colour to fit your bathroom scheme.

#4- Knives

Having a good, sharp set of knives is important whether you use them daily or not.  There isn’t anything more frustrating then trying to prepare vegetables with a dull knife.  From experience, even if you don’t use your knives that often, your friends who come over and cook at your home will appreciate a sharp set of knives.  Of course, with this item, there is a huge range of prices so choose a quality knife with a price point you are comfortable with.  A great all around knife brand is J.A. Henckels.

#5- Food Processor or Heavy Duty Blender

It is very common to register for the Kitchen Aid stand mixer, but the truth is, though it may look pretty on your counter, it’s not for everyone.  This is why I suggest a smaller appliance like a food processor or a multi-functional blender.  Whether your go to is a smoothie, homemade pesto or diced onions, a multi-tasking appliance is a versatile piece to add to your home.  It’s usage will change overtime to suit your needs.  For example, making homemade baby food for your future little ones 😊  I registered for the Kitchen Aid Food Processor.

I could go on and on about what would fill up an amazing registry, but these five building blocks will set you up on a good path to newlywed bliss!

So, if you need anymore tips on registering or how to select items to suit your home- let me know!  Otherwise, happy shopping!

Allie

Alex & Lily Home

MY WEDDING STORY- PART I

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How does a planner, plan her wedding?

I have decided to share my journey through planning my wedding to help shed light, advice and to potentially inspire those who are also planning their weddings.  Hopefully you enjoy my story as my journey continues.

When I first got engaged I was in disbelief and incredibly happy.  I could not help but look down at my left hand and see that the feelings I was feeling were real.  On a typical pacific northwest day, it was grey and raining and as my fiancé asked me to marry him between the crashing waves on the beach and the determined surfers in the ocean, we both knew that we wouldn’t be going surfing that day.  As soon as we got back to the house, I was on the phone and skyping with family members and friends to share the exciting news.  In between phone calls, I was already starting to plan.  What did I do first?  I asked my sister for her guest list spreadsheet from her wedding that contains all of our family members and their addresses.  It had begun.

 

As much of a planner that I am, believe it or not, I did not have my ‘dream wedding’ all worked out- much to my cousin’s disbelief.  I knew certain elements I wanted to have and had a faint feeling of how I wanted the atmosphere, but I did not have any of the details yet.  One thing I was aware of was that you can dream about ‘your big day’ for years and long for a particular setting, but you will not know if that setting is realistic until you have a rough idea of your guest count.  So having my sister’s spreadsheet was my first step to figuring out what would be realistic for me.  If you do not have a sibling who recently got married before you, that’s fine.  Start your own guest list and be generous at first.  Don’t worry about being stringent on the first draft- trust me, there will be many editions to come.

 

Being a planner and having worked in the industry for over five years, I am aware of how many elements are involved in planning a wedding.  So needless to say, I hit the ground running and got to work on vendors, theme and the venue search.  Though it is important to find a venue (and a date) early on, you need to also determine the overall style of the atmosphere you imagine.  I knew from the beginning that I wanted an outdoor, natural element instead of an indoor hotel ballroom feel.  I have a large family and knew that I wanted as many of them to be there as possible.  I also knew that I would be looking to either the Whistler or Okanagan regions as this was something that my fiancé and I discussed previously.  Keeping these elements in mind was crucial to be able to begin our venue search.  We ended up finding a vineyard in the Okanagan with a special meaning to us that will be the perfect mix of nature, style and fantastic views.

 

I will admit that given the timeline set before myself (nine months from engagement to walking down the aisle), I took on the role of a planner for first three months of my engagement.  I was approaching decisions and vendors from a planner point of view, as opposed to a bride.  I was action-based not emotionally driven.  I think though, that this approach helped me to get ahead of the planning to make sure I could meet the deadline nine months later.  Don’t worry if you’re not as enthusiastic about the planning as I am.  Make sure you do what is best for you and your partner.  If that means that you have a longer engagement or hire a wedding planner to help with things, then do so!  Also- remember that a main reason to hire an expert to help with the planning and executing is to relieve stress from the process so that you can focus on what’s important to you.  It also allows your friends and family to fully enjoy themselves and to not have any responsibilities on your wedding day.

 

So far, the experience of planning my wedding has been full on, action forward and exciting.  I can visualize the day and how I have planned for it to come together.  As one task after the other is checked off my list (of which I have many), the more room I have to think about the excitement to come!

Another wedding update will come soon, but for now, work on your Pinterest boards or drop me a line.

 

Allie

Alex & Lily Home